Rule No. 1: When you give your chilldren a job, make sure that you give VERY CLEAR instructions.
Today we acquired 25 kg of potatoes from the local market. So, with a certain amount of anticipation I decided that we would have baked spuds with our veggie stew tonight instead of the rice I had originally planned. However, I needed to get some of the shopping put away and fold the washing. What is more, Jeremy (8 1/2 nicknamed Jem) was at a bit of a loose end. So, I had an inspired moment
Me: "Jem can you wash the potatoes for me?"
Jeremy: "Yes Mummy what do I do?"
Me: "You need a bowl of water, use this brush and you scrub them clean."
Some time later...
I glance over to the sink and feel a moment of disquiet. Surely that wasn't in the sink a moment ago?
Pointing to a bowl and sinkful of soapy water and some very clean potatoes, I ask in a slightly panicked tone, "Don't tell me you've washed them in there?"
His little face crumples and he bursts into tears, "I didn't know..."
I laugh, what else can I do? Bless him, he had even got a clean tea towel out of the cupboard to dry them!
I gave him a kiss to dry his tears and sent him off to play with his little brother: the driveway is now a world ruled by pirates.
These little things are the pleasures that make up daily life and make fabulous memories. This I will treasure. I have the cleanest potatoes in Surrey, I have had a good laugh and I am reminded again that my children are a gift from the Lord: I am so blessed.
By the way, we are having rice tonight.
Tuesday 21 September 2010
Saturday 17 July 2010
Glue and Second Chances
Teenage boys: gotta love 'em!
Today William (15) and Jack (13), have used "No more nails" to glue the shed door and window shut, the trailer chock to the trailer wheel, and the front gate shut. Why you may ask? The answer eludes me. One part of me wants to have a 'finest parenting hour' and scream furiously at them BUT the rest of me is trying not to laugh, because it is reallyquite a good practical joke!
Now they are off to the woods to play. The question that some will ask is, do I trust them to behave because of their earlier actions? The answer must be, yes.
How many times have I messed up, done things that have caused others, or my self to ask ‘why did I/you do that?” and yet, God has given me a second chance.
I call our amazing God, The God of Second Chances. Each and every day I mess up and He picks me up, dust me off and reminds me in some way, through His Word, or a song or a conversation that I am loved, I am blessed and I am His. He allows me to continue in the role he has given me as a wife and mother, the call to witness through my life and to serve other women through church ministry and writing is still on me. I am imperfect and my life and walk with God is riddled with errors that I have made, with things I should NOT have said but Jesus gives me strength to carry on. He is my Rock; He is the Beginning and End and the Centre too. He is the One I turn to when I make a mistake, need protection, forgiveness and a place of safety. He is the One I walk with every day. So, although I make mistakes and mess up, my feet are firmly planted, stuck to the Rock of Life, Christ, He is the Glue in my life. It is my prayer that he will be be the Glue in my chldren's life too.
My Father gives me many second chances, I need to do the same for my children. Jesus said, 'forgive seventy times seven times" It is why God gives us, mothers (and fathers) an endless capacity for love, there is always more to give! There has to be, otherwise living with children who break our precious ornaments, draw on our walls, cut up our favourite books and ruin countless nights of sleep, would be unbearable. However, I have realised that I have to make sure my boys understand that there is a consequence for their actions whilst at the same time showing forgiveness so, I did make them clean up the glue before they went to the woods. God does the same for us; when we go to God about the harsh words we’ve said, or the people we’ve let down; we are always forgiven but we still have to go and make amends, to clean up what we’ve done.
I sometimes, probably irreverantly, think, I wonder if God looks at me and says "Oh Emma, what did you do that for?". I do look at my children and think that. Then I remember, I am God's and he loves me no matter how infuriating I am ! So, despite of how frustrating and awkward my boys can be, they are still the same precious people they were, when I first laid eyes on them ,at birth. The love that blossomed then, continues now. Praise God!
Just like God made me and you unique individuals, He also made each of my children as a unique individual who needs room to express himself uniquely and individually. Although, I would rather they didn’t do it by gluing our trailer to the driveway. Really, what were they thinking?
They probably weren't really thinking at all which is what happens in life genereally. We do things without thinking which leads to consequences we didn't necessarily anticipate.
God allows me the choice to make mistakes everyday and I know I have to let these precious boys loose on the world to make their own choices and mistakes and while they are out there, I am trusting God for their protection, for his favour on them and I pray my two-fifty-two* prayer over them:
Father God, please keep them safe and let them have a good time and Lord, please don’t let them do anything stupid.
Please Father, grow my boys grow into strong, faith-filled, wise men of God: the men that You made them to be. Grow them into Men like You, Jesus, who love and serve God the way He made them to love and serve Him. Whatever career path they follow I pray that they would live each day with and for You, Lord. Please reveal yourself to them and let them recognise you as the constant in their life, the Glue and their Saviour. In Jesus' precious name, Amen.
Actually, I pray this prayer for myself too. The best gift I can give for my children is to be the woman God made me to be, the mother he made me to be, the wife He made me to be; to love and serve Him daily, to grow daily in wisdom and stature with Him, to ask that His favour rests on me. I need to give thanks daily, that although I make mistakes, I fall down, I sin, God is the God who forgives he is the God of second chances.
So I praise Jesus, because his hand is on my life and just like I love my children, He loves me with the unconditional love of the Father-heart of God. I am there for my boys, to tend to bumps, bruises, disappointment, and forgive them when they do something they shouldn’t, that is just what my Abba Father does for me. In a similar way to me being the one who makes their home a safe place and cares for them in times of trouble, God has done the same for me and all of us, Jesus died on the cross for us so that we would have a safe place with God, eternal life, a Heavenly Home.
Consequently, here I am firmly glued to God, given a second chance, the one that is available to everyone. I've tried the other way, living life without God, I came unstuck, but that is another story.....
*Luke 2:52 That Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and men.
Today William (15) and Jack (13), have used "No more nails" to glue the shed door and window shut, the trailer chock to the trailer wheel, and the front gate shut. Why you may ask? The answer eludes me. One part of me wants to have a 'finest parenting hour' and scream furiously at them BUT the rest of me is trying not to laugh, because it is reallyquite a good practical joke!
Now they are off to the woods to play. The question that some will ask is, do I trust them to behave because of their earlier actions? The answer must be, yes.
How many times have I messed up, done things that have caused others, or my self to ask ‘why did I/you do that?” and yet, God has given me a second chance.
I call our amazing God, The God of Second Chances. Each and every day I mess up and He picks me up, dust me off and reminds me in some way, through His Word, or a song or a conversation that I am loved, I am blessed and I am His. He allows me to continue in the role he has given me as a wife and mother, the call to witness through my life and to serve other women through church ministry and writing is still on me. I am imperfect and my life and walk with God is riddled with errors that I have made, with things I should NOT have said but Jesus gives me strength to carry on. He is my Rock; He is the Beginning and End and the Centre too. He is the One I turn to when I make a mistake, need protection, forgiveness and a place of safety. He is the One I walk with every day. So, although I make mistakes and mess up, my feet are firmly planted, stuck to the Rock of Life, Christ, He is the Glue in my life. It is my prayer that he will be be the Glue in my chldren's life too.
My Father gives me many second chances, I need to do the same for my children. Jesus said, 'forgive seventy times seven times" It is why God gives us, mothers (and fathers) an endless capacity for love, there is always more to give! There has to be, otherwise living with children who break our precious ornaments, draw on our walls, cut up our favourite books and ruin countless nights of sleep, would be unbearable. However, I have realised that I have to make sure my boys understand that there is a consequence for their actions whilst at the same time showing forgiveness so, I did make them clean up the glue before they went to the woods. God does the same for us; when we go to God about the harsh words we’ve said, or the people we’ve let down; we are always forgiven but we still have to go and make amends, to clean up what we’ve done.
I sometimes, probably irreverantly, think, I wonder if God looks at me and says "Oh Emma, what did you do that for?". I do look at my children and think that. Then I remember, I am God's and he loves me no matter how infuriating I am ! So, despite of how frustrating and awkward my boys can be, they are still the same precious people they were, when I first laid eyes on them ,at birth. The love that blossomed then, continues now. Praise God!
Just like God made me and you unique individuals, He also made each of my children as a unique individual who needs room to express himself uniquely and individually. Although, I would rather they didn’t do it by gluing our trailer to the driveway. Really, what were they thinking?
They probably weren't really thinking at all which is what happens in life genereally. We do things without thinking which leads to consequences we didn't necessarily anticipate.
God allows me the choice to make mistakes everyday and I know I have to let these precious boys loose on the world to make their own choices and mistakes and while they are out there, I am trusting God for their protection, for his favour on them and I pray my two-fifty-two* prayer over them:
Father God, please keep them safe and let them have a good time and Lord, please don’t let them do anything stupid.
Please Father, grow my boys grow into strong, faith-filled, wise men of God: the men that You made them to be. Grow them into Men like You, Jesus, who love and serve God the way He made them to love and serve Him. Whatever career path they follow I pray that they would live each day with and for You, Lord. Please reveal yourself to them and let them recognise you as the constant in their life, the Glue and their Saviour. In Jesus' precious name, Amen.
Actually, I pray this prayer for myself too. The best gift I can give for my children is to be the woman God made me to be, the mother he made me to be, the wife He made me to be; to love and serve Him daily, to grow daily in wisdom and stature with Him, to ask that His favour rests on me. I need to give thanks daily, that although I make mistakes, I fall down, I sin, God is the God who forgives he is the God of second chances.
So I praise Jesus, because his hand is on my life and just like I love my children, He loves me with the unconditional love of the Father-heart of God. I am there for my boys, to tend to bumps, bruises, disappointment, and forgive them when they do something they shouldn’t, that is just what my Abba Father does for me. In a similar way to me being the one who makes their home a safe place and cares for them in times of trouble, God has done the same for me and all of us, Jesus died on the cross for us so that we would have a safe place with God, eternal life, a Heavenly Home.
Consequently, here I am firmly glued to God, given a second chance, the one that is available to everyone. I've tried the other way, living life without God, I came unstuck, but that is another story.....
*Luke 2:52 That Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and men.
Thursday 24 June 2010
True Treasure
True Treasure
This story was inspired by the parable of the pearl of great price and one that I wrote to share with our church's Boys Club. I wrote it specifically for those children, to share the idea about true treasure, but it is applicable to every one's life and reminds of us how much God loves each one of us.
What is treasure? Is it perhaps Gold, or precious coins, or perhaps is it jewels? This is the story of a boy who found out.
There once was a boy who loved to explore. And, like all boys he wanted to discover treasure. He was always looking for something. But whenever he found treasure it wasn’t as beautiful or as precious as he had hoped it would be. One day, in his garden, when he was 7, he dug up a dinosaur. But, only a plastic one buried by the dog.
Once, when he was 11, while he was helping his mum sort through his old toys he discovered something that had been very precious to him as a small child, his teddy. But, as he looked at it he saw that he didn’t think of it as so very precious anymore.
As he grew up into a man, he hungered to find real treasure and so he decided that he would become an adventurer, an explorer and a treasure hunter. (A bit like Bear Grylls, going out into the world to discover new things, new places and hopefully one day some precious treasure.) He was always looking for something new, something precious. Always hoping he would find some incredible treasure that would make him rich beyond his wildest dreams, you might say it was his dearest wish, his heart’s desire
Like all explorers he needed a map. He loved to look at maps and had a big collection of them. They would tell him the way to go and would direct his path. As he was looking through his maps one day he came upon one that took him to a place he had NEVER been. It showed the route to a place, about which he had heard an amazing story.
He had heard rumours that a the foot of a gnarled old tree in some place far from where he was there had been buried treasure many years ago. It had been buried by the richest man who had ever lived, who had said that he wanted to share it with anybody who was willing to seek it out because that person desired it with all his heart. The rumours were that this haul of treasure was more valuable than the crown jewels and that whoever found it would get to keep it FOREVER.
He had to sell everything he owned to buy the plane ticket to get to where the treasure was meant to be buried. He packed a rucksack full of all the equipment he thought he would need.
He travelled for many days and nights through wild jungles, across high mountain ranges and on rushing rivers. Until, deep in a place previously unknown to him, he came to the place where he believed the treasure was buried.
With his heart in his mouth he took his spade out of his pack and started to dig. After much sweating and digging he heard a dull thud as his spade hit the lid of the wooden box. With trembling hands he hauled out the wooden box, knowing that he was now heir to the richest man’s inheritance. Pasted to the top was a note, he barely glanced at it but this is what it said,
Dear seeker
You have found this precious treasure which I have left buried here to be discovered by my True Heir. So now I will call you My son. When you open this box My treasure is yours.
Much love from a Stranger
He scrabbled at the lock, eventually the padlock came apart and he reached into the box.
This is what he hauled out:
Some old valuable, coins from a foreign land. He felt quite excited for a minute.
Then he pulled out the most incredible jewels. including, a solid gold necklace, beads of some rare stones and an amazing broach made of beautiful diamonds and emeralds. His mouth dropped open in amazement. He had achieved his life’s ambition. He had discovered treasure. He was rich beyond his wildest dreams
But then, a niggling thought entered his head, “Oh, is that it. Is that all.”
Suddenly he felt sad and empty and all alone in the world.
He knew he had hauled all the treasure out of the box but idly he put his hand into the box again and draw out something that took his breath away. As he gazed at it in astonishment and joy, he knew had had found the real treasure, his heart leaped and he knew that this treasure is what he had been looking for all his life.
From the box he drew a rough wooden cross, the greatest treasure of all.
So what is true treasure?
God’s Kingdom is a priceless treasure. Jesus is the most precious treasure you could ever own. He has given himself to us, to you.
God wants you to own this precious treasure for yourself, it may require some sacrifices but it will be worth it forever, because unlike treasure that you can dig up, rubies, diamonds, coins, your old teddy the treasure from God is a forever treasure and if you seek God with all your heart, and soul and mind it is yours!
This story was inspired by the parable of the pearl of great price and one that I wrote to share with our church's Boys Club. I wrote it specifically for those children, to share the idea about true treasure, but it is applicable to every one's life and reminds of us how much God loves each one of us.
What is treasure? Is it perhaps Gold, or precious coins, or perhaps is it jewels? This is the story of a boy who found out.
There once was a boy who loved to explore. And, like all boys he wanted to discover treasure. He was always looking for something. But whenever he found treasure it wasn’t as beautiful or as precious as he had hoped it would be. One day, in his garden, when he was 7, he dug up a dinosaur. But, only a plastic one buried by the dog.
Once, when he was 11, while he was helping his mum sort through his old toys he discovered something that had been very precious to him as a small child, his teddy. But, as he looked at it he saw that he didn’t think of it as so very precious anymore.
As he grew up into a man, he hungered to find real treasure and so he decided that he would become an adventurer, an explorer and a treasure hunter. (A bit like Bear Grylls, going out into the world to discover new things, new places and hopefully one day some precious treasure.) He was always looking for something new, something precious. Always hoping he would find some incredible treasure that would make him rich beyond his wildest dreams, you might say it was his dearest wish, his heart’s desire
Like all explorers he needed a map. He loved to look at maps and had a big collection of them. They would tell him the way to go and would direct his path. As he was looking through his maps one day he came upon one that took him to a place he had NEVER been. It showed the route to a place, about which he had heard an amazing story.
He had heard rumours that a the foot of a gnarled old tree in some place far from where he was there had been buried treasure many years ago. It had been buried by the richest man who had ever lived, who had said that he wanted to share it with anybody who was willing to seek it out because that person desired it with all his heart. The rumours were that this haul of treasure was more valuable than the crown jewels and that whoever found it would get to keep it FOREVER.
He had to sell everything he owned to buy the plane ticket to get to where the treasure was meant to be buried. He packed a rucksack full of all the equipment he thought he would need.
He travelled for many days and nights through wild jungles, across high mountain ranges and on rushing rivers. Until, deep in a place previously unknown to him, he came to the place where he believed the treasure was buried.
With his heart in his mouth he took his spade out of his pack and started to dig. After much sweating and digging he heard a dull thud as his spade hit the lid of the wooden box. With trembling hands he hauled out the wooden box, knowing that he was now heir to the richest man’s inheritance. Pasted to the top was a note, he barely glanced at it but this is what it said,
Dear seeker
You have found this precious treasure which I have left buried here to be discovered by my True Heir. So now I will call you My son. When you open this box My treasure is yours.
Much love from a Stranger
He scrabbled at the lock, eventually the padlock came apart and he reached into the box.
This is what he hauled out:
Some old valuable, coins from a foreign land. He felt quite excited for a minute.
Then he pulled out the most incredible jewels. including, a solid gold necklace, beads of some rare stones and an amazing broach made of beautiful diamonds and emeralds. His mouth dropped open in amazement. He had achieved his life’s ambition. He had discovered treasure. He was rich beyond his wildest dreams
But then, a niggling thought entered his head, “Oh, is that it. Is that all.”
Suddenly he felt sad and empty and all alone in the world.
He knew he had hauled all the treasure out of the box but idly he put his hand into the box again and draw out something that took his breath away. As he gazed at it in astonishment and joy, he knew had had found the real treasure, his heart leaped and he knew that this treasure is what he had been looking for all his life.
From the box he drew a rough wooden cross, the greatest treasure of all.
So what is true treasure?
God’s Kingdom is a priceless treasure. Jesus is the most precious treasure you could ever own. He has given himself to us, to you.
God wants you to own this precious treasure for yourself, it may require some sacrifices but it will be worth it forever, because unlike treasure that you can dig up, rubies, diamonds, coins, your old teddy the treasure from God is a forever treasure and if you seek God with all your heart, and soul and mind it is yours!
Tuesday 22 June 2010
The Socks Box
The Socks Box
If there is one thing that makes me feel inadequate as a housewife it is our socks box. Or rather boxes, we have two of the things: an old Sainsburys shopping basket and a bright orange B&Q bucket. Both are full to overflowing. They sit, reproachfully, in the corner of our room. Every morning there is a scrabble for socks that might remotely match, if you don’t look too closely. William has taken to wearing noticeably odd socks. At first, it was out of desperation and now, well I think it is a kind of personal statement. Trouble is this actually makes the sock situation worse….. Lost partners lay sad and lonely in the basket waiting for their mate to turn up.
Occasionally, either Ross or myself will bring the boxes down in to the lounge and attempt to pair the seemingly hundreds of grayish, blackish socks that 4 boys and an adult male seem to need. Of course the problem is worsening now that Ross and the older boys all wear the same size socks, and then of course I have had a black sock phase myself….
We sort them into similar shades of grey and similar sizes, then we start pairing them up and after what seems like hours of work we have found perhaps 20 pairs of matching socks and still have literally heaps of unmatched ones left. So then the disheartened pairer leaves the sock boxes in the middle of the lounge floor for several days where it sneers at my abilities as a housewife until I can’t bear the sight of it anymore and take it upstairs to lurk in the corner of the bedroom once again, in the hope that one day these socks will miraculously find their mate and leap into the boys drawers by themselves.
The thing is, I get the boys new socks at the start of each school year as a matter of course and within two or three weeks we are in the same situation or in fact worse off. Now there are extra socks to add to the unmatched ones lurking in the baskets. Ross has suggested that we should throw them all away and start again but I CANNOT ADMIT DEFEAT!! I am loath to throw them away, what if it’s partner turns up in the next wash? What if they are all stowed away under Jack’s duvet and William’s bed and Tim’s and Jem’s might be in the garden. It’s been known to happen. A lot of the time I do actually get two matched socks that go in to the washing machine AT THE SAME TIME, why don’t they both come back to me?
I’ve tried all sorts of things to make the sorting easier, black socks with coloured toes for one boy, grey ones with stripy tops for another, plain grey for another, plain black for the fourth boy. It doesn’t help, especially when I catch Jack wandering around in one of his own white sports socks and one of Timothy’s grey school socks which he has stretched out of all recognition because he has feet like skis and Tim has still got tiny pudgy baby feet.
So I have almost given up. And now, every morning the bigger boys come barging into my room, dripping from the shower and start rummaging around for socks. We then proceed to have the same conversation every day.
Me: What are you doing in here?
Boy: Looking for socks
Me: Oh (feeling guilt-ridden and a failure as a mother and housewife)
Short pause with lots of socks being flung on floor, then boy triumphantly wriggles toes into odd socks
Me: Oh for goodness sake try to find a pair that actually match.
Boy: There aren’t any.
Me: (despairing) There must be...
Boy: (Exasperated) Mum, I am going to be late. (exits)
I bend down and start to reload the socks back into the sock box.
Once the older boys have left for school, the little ones have a good splash about in their bath and I lay out their clothes. I get out their trousers, their shirts, their school jumpers, their boxes/pants and then I get that sinking feeling…..I need to go and find them some socks!
***
You know, I may not get it right in the socks department, they may go out with feet covered in mis-matched hosery but I am praying that they leave our house covered in prayer. And, ultimately, I know that is far more important for my children's eternal future than their socks. As we are directed in Proverbs, it is so important that as our children grow up we "teach them the way to go, so that they will not depart from it" It is my hope that although I can't teach my children to put on a matched pair of socks, I can teach them that they should plant their feet on the Rock of Jesus, they should walk in His ways and look to Him everyday of their lives. I keep reminding myself that if I and my husband are praying for them, then who is. It is our responsibility as parents to pray for our children. Being the mother of 4 boys certainly gives me ample opportunity to pray!
At the moment, I am using a new way of praying for them. I have a great phone, with a calendar on it, so everyday at exactly the same time a little reminder goes off - "pray for the boys." It is a very useful tool, because let's be honest, we often forget our intention to pray about something on a regular basis. So, where ever I am, whatever I am doing, I can shoot off a prayer for them. It doesn't matter if I am out for coffee, in the car, doing the housework or running with the dogs in the woods! Some days, it is long sustained prayer others it is just an arrow prayer. Some days, the prayer is driven by current events; sometimes, I pray about their futures, their walk with God, their relationships. It depends what God puts on my heart. The thing is it is a great way for me to be disciplined in praying for my boys and I am covering them in prayer on a daily basis. Right now, it is working for me and that is what matters.
So this is something I have prayed in the past and something I may pray again in the future, maybe on one of rare occasions I get around to pairing socks:
Father God,
May the feet that go into those socks be planted firmly on the Rock of Christ everyday. May your word be a lamp to my children’s feet and a light for their path. Please, Father God, don’t let them stray. Be their guide, their Saviour. I pray that they have the ‘boots of readiness’. Ready to do Your will in their lives, ready to go where you lead them, ready to show hearts of compassion and the love of Christ with every step that they take. That they would walk with you every day and be the men You made them to be using the talents and gifts You gave according to Your plan and purpose for their lives. Amen
If there is one thing that makes me feel inadequate as a housewife it is our socks box. Or rather boxes, we have two of the things: an old Sainsburys shopping basket and a bright orange B&Q bucket. Both are full to overflowing. They sit, reproachfully, in the corner of our room. Every morning there is a scrabble for socks that might remotely match, if you don’t look too closely. William has taken to wearing noticeably odd socks. At first, it was out of desperation and now, well I think it is a kind of personal statement. Trouble is this actually makes the sock situation worse….. Lost partners lay sad and lonely in the basket waiting for their mate to turn up.
Occasionally, either Ross or myself will bring the boxes down in to the lounge and attempt to pair the seemingly hundreds of grayish, blackish socks that 4 boys and an adult male seem to need. Of course the problem is worsening now that Ross and the older boys all wear the same size socks, and then of course I have had a black sock phase myself….
We sort them into similar shades of grey and similar sizes, then we start pairing them up and after what seems like hours of work we have found perhaps 20 pairs of matching socks and still have literally heaps of unmatched ones left. So then the disheartened pairer leaves the sock boxes in the middle of the lounge floor for several days where it sneers at my abilities as a housewife until I can’t bear the sight of it anymore and take it upstairs to lurk in the corner of the bedroom once again, in the hope that one day these socks will miraculously find their mate and leap into the boys drawers by themselves.
The thing is, I get the boys new socks at the start of each school year as a matter of course and within two or three weeks we are in the same situation or in fact worse off. Now there are extra socks to add to the unmatched ones lurking in the baskets. Ross has suggested that we should throw them all away and start again but I CANNOT ADMIT DEFEAT!! I am loath to throw them away, what if it’s partner turns up in the next wash? What if they are all stowed away under Jack’s duvet and William’s bed and Tim’s and Jem’s might be in the garden. It’s been known to happen. A lot of the time I do actually get two matched socks that go in to the washing machine AT THE SAME TIME, why don’t they both come back to me?
I’ve tried all sorts of things to make the sorting easier, black socks with coloured toes for one boy, grey ones with stripy tops for another, plain grey for another, plain black for the fourth boy. It doesn’t help, especially when I catch Jack wandering around in one of his own white sports socks and one of Timothy’s grey school socks which he has stretched out of all recognition because he has feet like skis and Tim has still got tiny pudgy baby feet.
So I have almost given up. And now, every morning the bigger boys come barging into my room, dripping from the shower and start rummaging around for socks. We then proceed to have the same conversation every day.
Me: What are you doing in here?
Boy: Looking for socks
Me: Oh (feeling guilt-ridden and a failure as a mother and housewife)
Short pause with lots of socks being flung on floor, then boy triumphantly wriggles toes into odd socks
Me: Oh for goodness sake try to find a pair that actually match.
Boy: There aren’t any.
Me: (despairing) There must be...
Boy: (Exasperated) Mum, I am going to be late. (exits)
I bend down and start to reload the socks back into the sock box.
Once the older boys have left for school, the little ones have a good splash about in their bath and I lay out their clothes. I get out their trousers, their shirts, their school jumpers, their boxes/pants and then I get that sinking feeling…..I need to go and find them some socks!
***
You know, I may not get it right in the socks department, they may go out with feet covered in mis-matched hosery but I am praying that they leave our house covered in prayer. And, ultimately, I know that is far more important for my children's eternal future than their socks. As we are directed in Proverbs, it is so important that as our children grow up we "teach them the way to go, so that they will not depart from it" It is my hope that although I can't teach my children to put on a matched pair of socks, I can teach them that they should plant their feet on the Rock of Jesus, they should walk in His ways and look to Him everyday of their lives. I keep reminding myself that if I and my husband are praying for them, then who is. It is our responsibility as parents to pray for our children. Being the mother of 4 boys certainly gives me ample opportunity to pray!
At the moment, I am using a new way of praying for them. I have a great phone, with a calendar on it, so everyday at exactly the same time a little reminder goes off - "pray for the boys." It is a very useful tool, because let's be honest, we often forget our intention to pray about something on a regular basis. So, where ever I am, whatever I am doing, I can shoot off a prayer for them. It doesn't matter if I am out for coffee, in the car, doing the housework or running with the dogs in the woods! Some days, it is long sustained prayer others it is just an arrow prayer. Some days, the prayer is driven by current events; sometimes, I pray about their futures, their walk with God, their relationships. It depends what God puts on my heart. The thing is it is a great way for me to be disciplined in praying for my boys and I am covering them in prayer on a daily basis. Right now, it is working for me and that is what matters.
So this is something I have prayed in the past and something I may pray again in the future, maybe on one of rare occasions I get around to pairing socks:
Father God,
May the feet that go into those socks be planted firmly on the Rock of Christ everyday. May your word be a lamp to my children’s feet and a light for their path. Please, Father God, don’t let them stray. Be their guide, their Saviour. I pray that they have the ‘boots of readiness’. Ready to do Your will in their lives, ready to go where you lead them, ready to show hearts of compassion and the love of Christ with every step that they take. That they would walk with you every day and be the men You made them to be using the talents and gifts You gave according to Your plan and purpose for their lives. Amen
"A Woman of Substance"
"A Woman of Substance"
What is a woman of substance in the world?
There was a famous book and TV series by Barbara Taylor Bradford, in the 1980’s which seemed to suggest that a woman of substance was one who was very successful in business, self-sufficient and rich; a woman who went through men at a rate of knots and who had troublesome children. At the time, in my teenage, pre-Christian days I was gripped by the novel, if not the ideas the central character seemed to stand for.
But, even in the world outside the novel, a woman of substance seems to be one who has an amazing career, is pretty, slim as a reed, and who dresses amazingly well. She can be single or married, financially active or on a career break, a mother or not but she must be seen to be doing, driving forward, have ambition and above all, she must be successful.
But these things are all external, they are all the trappings of worldly success, the ‘stuff’ that goes with it. Does this really make her a woman of substance? A woman who matters? A woman who lives a life of meaning? What then, is a woman of substance really? Who does God say she is?
God’s view of a woman of substance
There are many different types of women in the Bible, wives (Sarah, Esther), mothers (Mary, Sarah, Hannah, Naomi), professional women (Lydia, a trader in purple cloth), leaders (Deborah, the judge), prophets (Anna, Miriam), prostitutes (Rahab) and many more. But, it not what they did that is important, it is who they are in Christ that counts. Their relationship with God is of central importance. What does God say in His Word makes a woman of substance? God’s interest is not external, it is the heart. Once we accept this fundamental truth, we can draw nearer to an understanding of the person God intends us to be. A woman in the world but not of it!
Women of faith
A woman in the crowd had suffered for twelve years with constant bleeding, and she could find no cure. Coming up behind Jesus, she touched the fringe of his robe. Immediately, the bleeding stopped.
“Who touched me?” Jesus asked
Everyone denied it, and Peter said, “Master, this whole crowd is pressing up against you.”
But Jesus said, “Someone deliberately touched me, for I felt healing power go out from me.” When the woman realised she could not stay hidden, she began to tremble and fell to her knees before him. The whole crowd heard her explaining why she had touched him and that she had felt immediately healed. “Daughter,” he said to her, your faith has made you well. Go in peace.” (Luke 8:43 – 48)
What is faith? Hebrews 11: 1a tells us It is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen. So then faith is confidence in God, in His loving assurance, in His care and in His love. It is knowing that we can Hope in God and not in vain. It is knowing for a fact that He is with me, even on the days when I feel alone. Hebrews 11:1 goes on to say that it is faith that gives us the assurance about things we cannot see. So even when we can’t see round the corner of the twisty path that makes up our life, it is the knowledge that God can. It is the reassurance that this gives us that enables us to walk around that blind corner because we have faith. Furthermore it is faith that gives us our good reputation and sets us apart for God (Hebrews 11:2 Through their faith, the people in days of old earned a good reputation.)
Without faith we have no relationship with God. It is faith which enables us to take the step to commit our lives to Christ in the first place and it is faith that enables us to walk with Christ daily, even when we think it might be easier to give up. (See Matthew 6:25-36) Faith is an act of worship, it is saying to God, “Yes, I believe in you,’’ and, “Yes, I believe you”. It was by faith that even Sarah was able to have a child, though she was barren and was too old. She believed that God would keep his promise. (Hebrews 11:11) It is faith that enables us to believe something will happen even when, on the face of it, it seems impossible. It is belief in the promises of God. It is faith that enables us to draw closer to God. Faith is what drove all the heroes of the Old Testament to live and act the way they did, as we see Hebrews 11:
And it is impossible to please God without faith (Hebrews 11:6)
God’s gift of faith to us is what enables us to takes risks. Look at the woman who touched Jesus. God gave her faith firstly, to reach out, secondly, do something almost beyond comprehension in those days, to touch a man other than her husband and most importantly, to believe that she would be healed by God. Jesus tells her, your faith has healed you. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him. (Hebrews 11:6b) What a reward for that woman, and what a reward awaits you and me, when we put our faith in Jesus. Faith is not something that simply gets us through daily living, it is what gets us into the glorious eternal life with God:
Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, along with everyone in your household Acts16:31
Therefore, since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us. Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory. Romans 5:1 – 2
Yes, we are called to be women of faith, this is one of the things that makes us women of substance in the eyes of God.
It is by faith that we have a relationship with Jesus and it is that relationship with Christ that marks us out as different in the world. Faith in God is but one aspect of a woman of substance in the eyes of God, but it is the springboard to all the others. It is through having a faith-filled, loving relationship with Christ that we are enabled to be all the things that God wants us to be. So, we need to spend time on that relationship. We need to spend time at the foot of the cross in worship, prayer and listening. When we worship God we express our reverence for Him. It is here where we repent and express our love to God and our gratitude to him for His forgiveness. It is from this reverence for God, our fear of the Lord that true wisdom comes.
It is from this relationship with Christ, as part of the family of God, that all the other aspects of a woman of substance will grow. From out the love of Christ will come a desire to serve God and others, to witness to others, to pray and to live a life that is holy and pleasing to Him. A life of true Godly substance.
And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice – the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. (Romans 12: 1)
Whatever life God calls us to, whether it is single or married, a mother or not, a career woman or a homemaker, he calls us to be his daughters, to have a loving relationship with Him. He calls us not to be super-women in earthly terms but Godly women, real women, women with a heart to serve God. Consequently, we need to examine our lives to see where we can become more of the woman of substance that God wants us to be. We need to ask Him what role each of us can play in our church, our communities, our homes.
Go for it, be the woman of substance God called you to be, living in relationship with Jesus, daily.
And Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace” (Luke 7:50)All scriptures in this essay are from NLT- New Living Translation
What is a woman of substance in the world?
There was a famous book and TV series by Barbara Taylor Bradford, in the 1980’s which seemed to suggest that a woman of substance was one who was very successful in business, self-sufficient and rich; a woman who went through men at a rate of knots and who had troublesome children. At the time, in my teenage, pre-Christian days I was gripped by the novel, if not the ideas the central character seemed to stand for.
But, even in the world outside the novel, a woman of substance seems to be one who has an amazing career, is pretty, slim as a reed, and who dresses amazingly well. She can be single or married, financially active or on a career break, a mother or not but she must be seen to be doing, driving forward, have ambition and above all, she must be successful.
But these things are all external, they are all the trappings of worldly success, the ‘stuff’ that goes with it. Does this really make her a woman of substance? A woman who matters? A woman who lives a life of meaning? What then, is a woman of substance really? Who does God say she is?
God’s view of a woman of substance
There are many different types of women in the Bible, wives (Sarah, Esther), mothers (Mary, Sarah, Hannah, Naomi), professional women (Lydia, a trader in purple cloth), leaders (Deborah, the judge), prophets (Anna, Miriam), prostitutes (Rahab) and many more. But, it not what they did that is important, it is who they are in Christ that counts. Their relationship with God is of central importance. What does God say in His Word makes a woman of substance? God’s interest is not external, it is the heart. Once we accept this fundamental truth, we can draw nearer to an understanding of the person God intends us to be. A woman in the world but not of it!
Women of faith
A woman in the crowd had suffered for twelve years with constant bleeding, and she could find no cure. Coming up behind Jesus, she touched the fringe of his robe. Immediately, the bleeding stopped.
“Who touched me?” Jesus asked
Everyone denied it, and Peter said, “Master, this whole crowd is pressing up against you.”
But Jesus said, “Someone deliberately touched me, for I felt healing power go out from me.” When the woman realised she could not stay hidden, she began to tremble and fell to her knees before him. The whole crowd heard her explaining why she had touched him and that she had felt immediately healed. “Daughter,” he said to her, your faith has made you well. Go in peace.” (Luke 8:43 – 48)
What is faith? Hebrews 11: 1a tells us It is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen. So then faith is confidence in God, in His loving assurance, in His care and in His love. It is knowing that we can Hope in God and not in vain. It is knowing for a fact that He is with me, even on the days when I feel alone. Hebrews 11:1 goes on to say that it is faith that gives us the assurance about things we cannot see. So even when we can’t see round the corner of the twisty path that makes up our life, it is the knowledge that God can. It is the reassurance that this gives us that enables us to walk around that blind corner because we have faith. Furthermore it is faith that gives us our good reputation and sets us apart for God (Hebrews 11:2 Through their faith, the people in days of old earned a good reputation.)
Without faith we have no relationship with God. It is faith which enables us to take the step to commit our lives to Christ in the first place and it is faith that enables us to walk with Christ daily, even when we think it might be easier to give up. (See Matthew 6:25-36) Faith is an act of worship, it is saying to God, “Yes, I believe in you,’’ and, “Yes, I believe you”. It was by faith that even Sarah was able to have a child, though she was barren and was too old. She believed that God would keep his promise. (Hebrews 11:11) It is faith that enables us to believe something will happen even when, on the face of it, it seems impossible. It is belief in the promises of God. It is faith that enables us to draw closer to God. Faith is what drove all the heroes of the Old Testament to live and act the way they did, as we see Hebrews 11:
And it is impossible to please God without faith (Hebrews 11:6)
God’s gift of faith to us is what enables us to takes risks. Look at the woman who touched Jesus. God gave her faith firstly, to reach out, secondly, do something almost beyond comprehension in those days, to touch a man other than her husband and most importantly, to believe that she would be healed by God. Jesus tells her, your faith has healed you. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him. (Hebrews 11:6b) What a reward for that woman, and what a reward awaits you and me, when we put our faith in Jesus. Faith is not something that simply gets us through daily living, it is what gets us into the glorious eternal life with God:
Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, along with everyone in your household Acts16:31
Therefore, since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us. Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory. Romans 5:1 – 2
Yes, we are called to be women of faith, this is one of the things that makes us women of substance in the eyes of God.
It is by faith that we have a relationship with Jesus and it is that relationship with Christ that marks us out as different in the world. Faith in God is but one aspect of a woman of substance in the eyes of God, but it is the springboard to all the others. It is through having a faith-filled, loving relationship with Christ that we are enabled to be all the things that God wants us to be. So, we need to spend time on that relationship. We need to spend time at the foot of the cross in worship, prayer and listening. When we worship God we express our reverence for Him. It is here where we repent and express our love to God and our gratitude to him for His forgiveness. It is from this reverence for God, our fear of the Lord that true wisdom comes.
It is from this relationship with Christ, as part of the family of God, that all the other aspects of a woman of substance will grow. From out the love of Christ will come a desire to serve God and others, to witness to others, to pray and to live a life that is holy and pleasing to Him. A life of true Godly substance.
And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice – the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. (Romans 12: 1)
Whatever life God calls us to, whether it is single or married, a mother or not, a career woman or a homemaker, he calls us to be his daughters, to have a loving relationship with Him. He calls us not to be super-women in earthly terms but Godly women, real women, women with a heart to serve God. Consequently, we need to examine our lives to see where we can become more of the woman of substance that God wants us to be. We need to ask Him what role each of us can play in our church, our communities, our homes.
Go for it, be the woman of substance God called you to be, living in relationship with Jesus, daily.
And Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace” (Luke 7:50)All scriptures in this essay are from NLT- New Living Translation
Her Children arise up and call her blessed
“Her Children arise up and call her blessed” Proverbs 31: 28a
A day in the life of an ordinary Christian mum
‘Jack, you really shouldn't carve my dining room table.’ I said in a mild voice as my son whittled away at my, admittedly rather battered table, with his butter knife. It was an ordinary morning in the October half-term in 2006, Jack was 9 at the time.
I turned to see William, our 11 year old about to flick a cheerio, at Jack and as he took aim,I gently got his attention. He had the grace to look at me and smile guiltily. By which time Jack had taken the advantage and flicked the cheerio at William! Meanwhile Timothy, 14 months finished his weetabix and stood up in his high chair, precariously teetering, as he yelled for more food. Timothy, my walking dustbin, who loves breakfast. I give him a croissant. Jeremy, almost 5, seeing the croissants has developed an instant dislike for weetabix, which up until now he loved! Breakfast in the Phillips household, happy mayhem!! Ross escapes to work: in fact he made a very hurried departure this morning because he burnt the croissants and was feeling condemned and rather hurt by the baleful gazes of his wife and eldest son.
Racheal, my niece who stayed over the night nibbles daintily, like a well brought up girl, on her croissant and then says something in her loudest voice: Princess Foghorn had come to sleep over for the night.
It was great: I got my pink fix because I put make up on her that morning! Well, being the mother of 4 boys, I need to get my pink fix when I can!
By 10:30 my garden is full with about 5 more children from the neighbourhood, so the total number of children on my property is 11, which is a small number: the day before yesterday there were 16. Please bear in mind I live in a mid-terraced 3 bedroom house with a postage stamp sized garden! I just hope that the children that are congregating here are attracted to my home and family by the magnetism of God through the irresistible pull of Jesus in us! I want us to be a witness for God.
11:30 and the door bell goes, Simon and John, William twin friends from school have arrived for their first ever sleepover. Please God let them have a good time with us today.
We are an ordinary family living in an ordinary street with God’s extraordinary seal on us: Jesus!
My house is permanently a mess, I am very bad at keeping house: I am bored by the hum-drum of housework and cleaning. I think I am brilliant if I am up to date with the washing. But, I would rather have a messy house filled with love and laughter than a perfect, empty house. Yes, people might think we are messy and disorganised. Yes my boys fight and argue, yes, things go wrong. Some days, I am grumpy and argumentative and don’t feel like being responsible for all these children, but those feelings pass and I have got something that fills in all the gaps and makes it all worthwhile: Jesus. God has blessed me with this wonderful family…. And as I sit here musing about this …. whoops, tears, William has just landed on Jeremy on the trampoline. Jeremy belts him….. all is fine and forgotten in a moment as I stand up and knock on the window to prevent World War 3.
Father God, my boys are a precious gift and I am so grateful for them. I praise you Father God for their uniqueness, for their individual personalities, talents and abilities. I pray that you would ‘guide them along the best pathway for their lives, that You would advise and watch over them,’ (Psalm 32:8) that Your ‘unfailing love would surround them because they trust in You,’ (Psalm 32:10) that they would ‘rejoice and be glad because they obey You’ (Psalm 32:11) all their lives; that they never backslide or deviate from your plan and purpose for their lives. That they would seek you first and that ‘Your world will always be a lamp to guide their feet and a light for their path’ (Psalm 119:105). I ask that You give them Your wisdom and discernment. Fill them with boldness. I ask that their witness be fearless and true to You, Jesus. Please draw them to Your side, let them have the own first had relationship with You. Amen.
Oh boy, there are too many on the trampoline, I must go……..
“Okay, everybody off, it’s getting a bit wild…..”
“Emma, I can’t find my sock…..”
“Mummy, I can’t find my sock…..”
Same day…a bit later
“I want to paint”
I surprise myself by saying, “Oh, Okay.”
“Emma, I don’t have a paint brush.”
“Jack, lend Rachael one of your brushes.”
“No!”
Extra patiently I respond,“Jack, in this family we share our stuff.”
“She’s going to ruin it” he whines.
“Jack, let Rachael use one of your brushes!”
I walk away. I walk back: Rachael has one of Jack’s paint brushes. Maybe the gentle discipline is going in?
The garden is empty, most of the children are round at the park playing football. Rachael and Jeremy are painting. Tim is wandering dangerously close to the paint. I have already washed off paint from my new white top.
It is nearly lunch-time. We will be 9 for lunch. It isn’t always like this, in term time it is just Tim and me. I had better get the pita on the table and the jam and tuna. Then I need to get the dinner. The house is trashed. Everywhere I walk, I step over stuff. I, haven’t done a thing yet but I amazingly, have managed to have had a quiet time and there is a gospel cd on in the kitchen and I am going to stand in there and be fed by God in that pool of peace, while I get lunch. My life is manic sometimes but I wouldn’t change the children for anything………
“No,” Jeremy screams at Tim who cries and carries on. I wonder what he is doing? There is paint in the lounge…I think I had better go and see what is happening………….
A day in the life of an ordinary Christian mum
‘Jack, you really shouldn't carve my dining room table.’ I said in a mild voice as my son whittled away at my, admittedly rather battered table, with his butter knife. It was an ordinary morning in the October half-term in 2006, Jack was 9 at the time.
I turned to see William, our 11 year old about to flick a cheerio, at Jack and as he took aim,I gently got his attention. He had the grace to look at me and smile guiltily. By which time Jack had taken the advantage and flicked the cheerio at William! Meanwhile Timothy, 14 months finished his weetabix and stood up in his high chair, precariously teetering, as he yelled for more food. Timothy, my walking dustbin, who loves breakfast. I give him a croissant. Jeremy, almost 5, seeing the croissants has developed an instant dislike for weetabix, which up until now he loved! Breakfast in the Phillips household, happy mayhem!! Ross escapes to work: in fact he made a very hurried departure this morning because he burnt the croissants and was feeling condemned and rather hurt by the baleful gazes of his wife and eldest son.
Racheal, my niece who stayed over the night nibbles daintily, like a well brought up girl, on her croissant and then says something in her loudest voice: Princess Foghorn had come to sleep over for the night.
It was great: I got my pink fix because I put make up on her that morning! Well, being the mother of 4 boys, I need to get my pink fix when I can!
By 10:30 my garden is full with about 5 more children from the neighbourhood, so the total number of children on my property is 11, which is a small number: the day before yesterday there were 16. Please bear in mind I live in a mid-terraced 3 bedroom house with a postage stamp sized garden! I just hope that the children that are congregating here are attracted to my home and family by the magnetism of God through the irresistible pull of Jesus in us! I want us to be a witness for God.
11:30 and the door bell goes, Simon and John, William twin friends from school have arrived for their first ever sleepover. Please God let them have a good time with us today.
We are an ordinary family living in an ordinary street with God’s extraordinary seal on us: Jesus!
My house is permanently a mess, I am very bad at keeping house: I am bored by the hum-drum of housework and cleaning. I think I am brilliant if I am up to date with the washing. But, I would rather have a messy house filled with love and laughter than a perfect, empty house. Yes, people might think we are messy and disorganised. Yes my boys fight and argue, yes, things go wrong. Some days, I am grumpy and argumentative and don’t feel like being responsible for all these children, but those feelings pass and I have got something that fills in all the gaps and makes it all worthwhile: Jesus. God has blessed me with this wonderful family…. And as I sit here musing about this …. whoops, tears, William has just landed on Jeremy on the trampoline. Jeremy belts him….. all is fine and forgotten in a moment as I stand up and knock on the window to prevent World War 3.
Father God, my boys are a precious gift and I am so grateful for them. I praise you Father God for their uniqueness, for their individual personalities, talents and abilities. I pray that you would ‘guide them along the best pathway for their lives, that You would advise and watch over them,’ (Psalm 32:8) that Your ‘unfailing love would surround them because they trust in You,’ (Psalm 32:10) that they would ‘rejoice and be glad because they obey You’ (Psalm 32:11) all their lives; that they never backslide or deviate from your plan and purpose for their lives. That they would seek you first and that ‘Your world will always be a lamp to guide their feet and a light for their path’ (Psalm 119:105). I ask that You give them Your wisdom and discernment. Fill them with boldness. I ask that their witness be fearless and true to You, Jesus. Please draw them to Your side, let them have the own first had relationship with You. Amen.
Oh boy, there are too many on the trampoline, I must go……..
“Okay, everybody off, it’s getting a bit wild…..”
“Emma, I can’t find my sock…..”
“Mummy, I can’t find my sock…..”
Same day…a bit later
“I want to paint”
I surprise myself by saying, “Oh, Okay.”
“Emma, I don’t have a paint brush.”
“Jack, lend Rachael one of your brushes.”
“No!”
Extra patiently I respond,“Jack, in this family we share our stuff.”
“She’s going to ruin it” he whines.
“Jack, let Rachael use one of your brushes!”
I walk away. I walk back: Rachael has one of Jack’s paint brushes. Maybe the gentle discipline is going in?
The garden is empty, most of the children are round at the park playing football. Rachael and Jeremy are painting. Tim is wandering dangerously close to the paint. I have already washed off paint from my new white top.
It is nearly lunch-time. We will be 9 for lunch. It isn’t always like this, in term time it is just Tim and me. I had better get the pita on the table and the jam and tuna. Then I need to get the dinner. The house is trashed. Everywhere I walk, I step over stuff. I, haven’t done a thing yet but I amazingly, have managed to have had a quiet time and there is a gospel cd on in the kitchen and I am going to stand in there and be fed by God in that pool of peace, while I get lunch. My life is manic sometimes but I wouldn’t change the children for anything………
“No,” Jeremy screams at Tim who cries and carries on. I wonder what he is doing? There is paint in the lounge…I think I had better go and see what is happening………….
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